Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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What do you calla baby nailed to a wall? Art.

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what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

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Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

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what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

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how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

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What's 9 + 10 19

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You're so black that other black people make fun of how black you are.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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A cow walks into a bar and said, "Bartender give me a glass of milk!"

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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A pigeon walks into a bar. Someone left the door opened.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

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How do you make a person laugh? Tell a good joke How do you make them cry? Tell a sad story How do you make them cry and laugh at the same time? Tell a bad joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops