A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

What do you say when someone attempts to steal your cheese? Give me my cheese!!!

Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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