A horse walks into a bar. It trips over a barstool, breaks it's leg, and is butchered and turned into canned dog food.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama's so fat that she needs substantially larger clothes than most other people

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Uh... What was emulating again?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the black man sit in the back of the bus? becouse all the seat where taken in the front

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did the 14 year old boy get for christmas? nothing because he his sitting in prison for killin his parents and is serving a life sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops