How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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whats long, hard and full of seamen submarine

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What did the black man say while getting mauled by a jungle cat? "Help im dying", as the animal riped him peice by peice with fear in his eyes he died slowly as the jungle cat draged him back to its den helplessly he fades away and the animal eats him.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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The man and the women were doing something. What are you looking? They just talked

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I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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Steve Jobs didn't die. He went to go set up iCLOUD.

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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Whats the difference between a 100 dead babies and a ferrari? One is an automobile and the other is a tragic reminder that SIDS is a serious and deadly problem.

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Why are some people so good at basketball? Because they are all black.

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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What did the mentally retarded man say to the Waiter who brought him his soup? Thanks for bringing me my soup.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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Did you hear about the sale on the toyota cars from japan? if you can get it out of the water its free!

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I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops