- Anti Joke

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it's a grape and therefore unable to speak.

so there are 2 muffins in an oven,1 says to the other "holy s**t its hot in here!" and the other says,"omg!its a talking muffin!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

what's funnier than hell? heaven

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

What's blue? The sky.

roses are red, violets are blue.

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

What's large and blue? Probably quite a few things.

Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !