why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why couldn't little Sally fall asleep? She was on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Compton

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Do you like fishsticks No

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops