Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

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I like your hair

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scientology.

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How many spiders dose it take to cover a wall? Four, if they are 7 feet tall

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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your life

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What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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where does a person with one leg work? anywere

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Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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Why did Superman cross the road? I dunno.

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why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

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What do you call a dozen Muslims waiting to board a train? Passengers...you racist.

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What does a fish say when it swims into a wall? Damn

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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