What did the man say to the duck? Nothing ducks don't talk.

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Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

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What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

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What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

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I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

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What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

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Chuck Norris didn't count to infinite twice. He can't even do it once.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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Why was Steve hungry? Because the last time he ate was yesterday.

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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A random guy walks into your house and says hi. You say SHUTUP

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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Cripples are lame.

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Where's my baby??

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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Two muslims walk into the bar, Everybody continues with their daily lives. One should not be judged by their race or religion as all humans on earth are as equal as one another and should be treated the same way..... And then the building blew up.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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