How do u make a fat person cry......... tell em mc donnalds is closed (^_^)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do you call a rat with wings? an evolutionary masterpiece

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Nippies

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is 0% sugar, 100% pure, 150% hyperbole, 90% bug-free, has 4815162342 lines of code, autonomous, is awesome, bigger than a breadbox, bread is pain, is bringin' home the bacon, classy, doesn't use the U-word, deja vu, deja vu (oh wait a moment), does barrel rolls doesn't avoid double negatives, doesn't bother with clones, Engage!, Enhanced!, Euclidean!, Excitement!, Exploding creepers, Finally complete!, finger-licking, full of stars, funky LOL, GOTY, Give Us Gordon, Indev, Ingots, and has an End? Minecraft!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Boy: "Mom, I don't want to walk in circles anymore." Mother: "Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the ground."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Your Momma's so ugly, she went to the grocery store, and went she got out of her car, people said, "You're ugly."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hello, I'm David and I just stabbed my aunt in the eye. Just kidding, my name isn't David. That was an Aunt Eye(anti) joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

1 fish 2 fish red fish wait why is the fish red , oh I forgot I killed it

thumb_up thumb_down -17

People made fun of a plant for walking into a bar. Little did they know it hadn't been watered for days.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock. Who's there? Not the Twin Towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

where does a person with one leg work? anywere

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is Soulja Boy's favorite letter? I don't know. You go ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car> "Get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops