A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

thumb_up thumb_down +64

men, men like men= men+bed

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

*prepares this to get negged*

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

OMG guess what she just told me!! idk......im deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

The biggest joke in anti-joke are these two MOST FAVED What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. +17662 likes MOST HATED whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven -1714 dislikes GUESS WHAT : they are both jew jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Want to hear a cat joke? Just kitten.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Women.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops