what did Santa say to the 3 hookers? Merry Christmas!

What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

THE GAME

why could the boy use the computer there was nothing wrong with him

What did one hater say to the other hater? I hate you.

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

A man is eating a sandwich. He is promptly shot in the face.

Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

Friends are like pickles. If you eat them, they die.

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe? Yes, once.

Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

Yo mama so stupid She took in part of an experiment and was indeed proclaimed stupid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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