What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

where would you hide 100 dead jews in a car the ashtray because they were all cremated

Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

What did the black kid call the white kid? His name...

No. Yes.

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Well the chicken was very confused and had no logical brain power to think or know where it was going. Once he crossed the road he went into the ice cream parlor but was soon kicked out due to lack on communication

Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

a

Snooki want smoosh smoosh

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, cus feminists can't change shit.

What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

What's the difference between a Cadillac and a pile of dead babies? My wife didn't cheat on me in a pile of dead babies.

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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