Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A duck waddles into a bar. He orders a drink and promtly drinks it vecause he has had a hard day at work.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue. The pen is blue. THE GOD DAMN PEN IS BLUE!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Me: Hello. You: Oh, hi. Me: How are you today? You: I'm fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A seal walks into a club. Do you like my new shoes?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops