Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

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2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

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one morning i turned on my tv

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What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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