What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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Why did the asbestos cross the road? Because it was being removed from an elementary school due to the fact that asbestos is an air pollutant which is regulated under section 112 of the Clean Air Act of 1970.

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A jew walks into a church. he wishes to be touched by God.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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A white man walks into a bar. Then he gets a beer.

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why does andy speak when not spoken too because he wants a smack

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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What did the white man say to the black man that sneezed? -Bless you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your child has been in a terrible car accident.

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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