What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

A man walks into a bar, ouch!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

A baby seal walks into a club.

why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

What do you call a sober man driving a car? a designated driver

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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