GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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I like poop in my butt

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Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house Purple because ice cream dosnt have bones

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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roses are red violets are blue cookie monster is gonna eat you big bird is yellow you look mellow dont forget elmo to

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A broken boomerang

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Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

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what do you call a black man falling off a cliff holy shit

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Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

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A man walks in a bar he talks to the bartender aand he tells him a joke about him and hs friends. how do you find out his name? You killl the bartenders friends and family untill he talks.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

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Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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