Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

Pineapple.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

What did the homeless man say to the rich man? Can i have some food?

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes......

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

A blonde walks into a drycleaning store 2 pick up her clothes and as she walks out the empoyee says cum again and the blonde says shut up it was toothpast this time!!!!

Lol (wow, I am using that a lot... BAAAD!) Anyway, yeaaaah, you thanked me for being who I am, this rush of happy drugs from the body is totally a sign of taking insult... Funny, I am not much of a endorphin person otherwise.

Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

j

How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

National security?

What? Why?

sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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