Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Jesse gets so many ladies

Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

Once upon a time, there was a Y O U M A D and they all lived happily ever after.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

It's funny that Melo and Garnett are going to be on the same Allstar team

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

whats the capital of congo famine

Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

What do you call a black male teacher? A: A Teacher .

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...