Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

why do women rip you off? Because they like money

world peace

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

If i open this door you can go trough it

How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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