Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Actually it is,how may i help you?

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

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You suck big fat slobber

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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I was chatting to a woman in a bar, when the subject of kids came up. I said, "My son has had to wear nappies for his entire life." "That's awful," she said, "what's wrong with him?" I replied, "Nothing. He's two and a half."

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a horse walks into a blender ow

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A woman went outside for some fresh air.

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Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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Why does Courtney smell? she has a severe lack of personal hygiene which needs addressing,

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YOLO

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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Hitler wasn't that bad... He DID kill Hitler.

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What's black and white and red all over? News paper that was used to cover up a dead body.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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