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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, I have Alzheimers, Hey i just met you.

What do you call a black man at the front of a bus? A bus driver

Roused are red violets are blue I just s*** in my own poo

XD I must like, really be into you, God I cannot breathe XD, that is like the most disgusting thing I have heard in my life, but coming from you that just comes out so quaint! XD

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What's the deal with airline food?

If there are 3 apples, and you take 2, how many do you have? BLAM! Texas castle law, motherfukker!

What do you call two black men kicking a ball? Soccer.

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

A man walked into a bar. Ow!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

Why did the boy scream? Because his girlfriend poked him in the butthole, which he was not expecting. Thus surprising him.

What's worse than finding a worm in Your apple?? A pile of dead babies

Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

Why is this funny? cause it is funny

Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

Pickup line: Boy: Hey, do you have a library card? Girl: Yes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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