A penguin was waddling along one day and saw a seal.. The seal stood up and procceded to talk and jump and even twirled around... The penguin realized this was impossible for a seal to be doing this so he hopped on his unicycle and just rode home because he was going to be late for his piano recital

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Womens' rights.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

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There once was a man from Bangkok, who hated limericks.

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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whats black and yellow and makes you smile? a bus full of black people going off a cliff. do you shame is? there was three empty seats.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

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Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

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Nah

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What do you call a lawyer who came from the ghetto? Someone who did quite well for themselves despite coming from a tough area.

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One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? cheese.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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democracy

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

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Knock knock *runs away laughing*

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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