roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

Mmmmmmm Lemons

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

jack shine has boobs

A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

what did the deaf kid get for christmas ? An ipod.

My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...