A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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What's your name? You tell me.

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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Adam Sandler.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

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Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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womens rights!

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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