Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

hi im paul!

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

your mom

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Women's rights.

A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

Rebecca Black's new album.

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...