what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock, Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

2+2= 478

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Alan: My Grandfather has a jacket made from jews that he killed while he was in the SS. James: Really? Alan: No, I'm Korean. My Grandfather would not be allowing into the SS.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops