Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

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PICKLES

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High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? a bike

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Why did the black man run when he heard police sirens? Because he was parked in a handicap spot

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

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What's the difference between a raccoon and a bear? One's a raccoon, the other's a bear.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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why couldn't jimmy play on the swings at recess.. Because he's been dead for 5 years

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Koalas mum is a slut

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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nice tits.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A baseball, bat, and a glove.

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There's two sausages in a pan.. One says "Wow it's hot in here" The other says... "agrhhh a talking sausage"

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sfdg

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? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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