Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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What is so bad about a black jew. They have to sit in the back of the gas chamber

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What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

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Why is water clear? Because it doesn't have a pigmentation.

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

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whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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