Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

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Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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one day a grape was in the sun raisin

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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?"what's up" "A preposition"

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Dont look at me.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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A man walking on a beach looks into the surf and sees a beautiful oil lamp floating to shore. Wondering who in the heck uses oil lamps anymore, he picks it up, sees a bit of crust on the side, and rubs it clean. Just then a burst of smoke comes out of the lamp, and a genie floats out and stands before the man. "Oh master, thank you for releasing me from the lamp. In thanks, I grant to you one wish. Anything you ask for, it will be true," said the genie. "One wish? What happened to three," asked the man. "Dude, don't push it. We're in a recession. So what's your wish?" "OK. OK. I ... I... I WISH I WAS RICH!" screamed the man. The genie folded his arms, blinked twice, scratched his nose, nodded his head, and spun in a circle twice. "And it is SO!" he cried out. The man looked at himself, looked at the genie, but nothing seemed to have changed. "WTF, genie. Am I rich?" The genie replied, "Well no. You said, 'I wish I was rich.' I made you rich... ten years ago. You were rich. Now you're not. You used the indicative mood 'was.' If you wanted it to become true now in the present, you should have used the subjunctive mood 'were.'"

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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