How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

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I'm homeless.

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

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What do you call 17 blondes standing in a row? most certainly not Charles because it seems as though it would be incrediblely unlikley that a girl would be named Charles

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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