Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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What is Ron afraid of? Spiders!

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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Bitch

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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Your mom went to college

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops