Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

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What's 9+10? 19

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Stop with the 9/11 jokes guys. They're just plane stupid.

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What do you get if you cross a centipede with a millipede? I don't know but it sure has a lot of legs

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What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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I don't think Holocaust jokes are funny, Anne Frankly I find them offensive.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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It's long!

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What's blue and white and can't climb a tree? A fridge in a denim jacket!

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What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

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it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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Penis

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

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Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

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What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

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Rush Limbaugh

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

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Yesterday I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops