You suck big fat slobber

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What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

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Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

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why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

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Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Why did Christopher Columbus sail to America? Because sailing was faster than swimming.

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What is the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Jews are a religious group. Boy scouts are a group of boys who enjoy camping and other outdoor activities.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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lol im s0 gut at spelign at engrish N u laughd n liekd diZ funi joek XDD u most LUV LE MEMEZ n EMOtikons Lol (^-^) y u guyz so st00p1d at math Wtf???!?!? 1+1=8 i m soooo smurt hahaha I <3 warrior cats n dance 2 gangnum stail wile masturbatin 2 swagbois le raeg comicz ;3!! . And now you are dying of cancer.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? Because her asshole brother pushed her :)

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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knock knock who's there? rude, interrupting cow rude, interrupting cow who? just kidding, its steve. cows can't talk

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a woman votes!

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

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I didn't know that guy did crossfit

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caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

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Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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