Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

Roses are red Violets are penis

What did the abortion say to the womb? I'm outta here.

what did the white man say to the black man with the gun? Nothing he was dead

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

a retard lost...

A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

A duck, a mailman, and a poet were contemplating suicide, then they changed their minds.

Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

what happened to your gran you tell me

Chuck norris survived rapture.

Lil' Wayne

guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

You:why did the kid get a massage? Guest:Why? You:Cuz he wanted one.

Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

What do you call a cannibal who won't eat his own brother? A pussy.

Why is the black guy bad a Hockey? He was raped with a hockey stick by his father, after many years of pain and sex jokes, and the internet meme of the rapey daddy came out, the man then tryed to kill him self, but lived and the became a... shit i forgot, well long story short, it was roger from family guy.

A white man and a black woman run for president The Black woman received 65% of all woman votes, 75% of all Hispanics and 99% of all black votes. The White man still won, and was a great president.

What doesn't have opposable thumbs, barks at the mail man, eats dog food, and is good at every sport? Air bud

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

haha, you're an orphan

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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