A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

what do you call a black man named mike

Knock, knock. Who's there? Suzie. How is that even possible?

Person 1 What's good? Person 2 Your mom's love making

Your mom is so fat that she is at risk for type two diabetes.

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cactus and you are a Jew EJ

A girl asks a guy "How come you don't take me dancing anymore?" The guy said "Because we were both killed in a car accident."

Why did the asian die? he was driving

What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

69. Yeah- that's my street address.

How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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