- Anti Joke

Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

what happend to the ghost? he dissapeared! :)

why did the man scream? he stubbed his toe on a door

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

Yeah, totally.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

Roses are red Violets are blue I own a lawn mower Can you swim?

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

Compton

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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