Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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12 22 giraffe hippo 66 otter zebra cat 99 okay, the end

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a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

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i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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Women's rights.

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You're so straight!

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Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

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Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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nice shorts.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

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Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

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69

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

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Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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