Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why does osama bin ladens death make me happy? because he was the leader of alkida and created many threats to the u.s. thus the death is ending this creating more freedom. (OSAMA LIKES PENIS!!)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

This "anti-joke" got me an A+ many many years ago, shortened though, so you can make Your own conclusions. Beware of the rising sight, do not stare at the sunny dry sky... The poles... Do not stare at the blood as it drips it, the sand covered ground soaked red... Cover your ears! The seal is not looking above, with but is shouting to you! "WHY DID YOU FORSAKE ME!!!" HE ASKS AS YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN HIT HIM, smirking sadistically, SMILING, yes... Even LAUGHING! The rain soaks you wet, as the skies themselves cry and hide in shame... ...The seal is broken, so watch as your kin, those among your children twist to hellish beasts whose demon is the only name they bear... Readying to conquer the world! ...Yet they need to be certain, to be certain that your master is gone, yet we have waited FOR TOO DAMN LONG! The master answers no more, darkness covers the skies as the blood soaked earth beyond your feet decays, yet you feel no fear, no adrenaline pumping, no tears, no soul crushing fear! What kind of MONSTER ARE YOU? Darkness falls, you struggle with no defense... No excuse... You BROKE THE SEAL! The first three awaken, as the conquest of this world IS AT HAND OF THE DEMONS! ...This leads to war... To strife, to disease!... Until you cannot run no more... Hope... You fall to your knees saying your last prayers, as the pale one appears before you... Jesus? No, his hateful father which abandoned you over two thousand years ago... ...Salvation you shout to the skies! Our savior is here! As the forces of darkness stare in defeat... Yet as his father, the father of sin, the father of the seal gazes into your soul with red eyes and demonic teeth and laughs, you no longer wonder where is your God, nor what has he become... ...But rather what you made him, the light of glory, now the new KING OF DARKNESS! AND ALL THANKS TO YOU MOCKING THE MEMORY OF HIS SONS DEATH! You had it coming, this world belongs to us... And we are not your kind... TRUE GLORY BE KNOWN TO ALL! THE ERA OF THE TRUE DEMONS IS OVER! ...You are the last remaining, lying on the floor broken, the very last words you hear... ...Revenge is mine! Humanity is dead... You feel the holy spirit, yet all you feel is satisfied quenched screams of centuries, even millenia of revenge... ...Rule new children of the dark, humanity is taking its deepest, saddest last breaths, "The death of my only true son, shall no longer pass me by" God has finally returned... But not to save you... ...God is against you! and you know why FAR TOO WELL!... :You know far too well who I am... But then again, do you know me and what I am at all? You will... Soon enough children of the forsaken one... Because I am his prophet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

autistic kids rock

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A woman walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Hi. He said it in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops