Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are red grass is green your little ugly a*s makes me wanna scream

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy fall off his skateboard before running into a cross-section? Because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops