A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

what happens when you and a 6 foot black guy get stuck on an island? hang him by a tree and make shelter

Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

Knock knock Whose there? 4

Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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