Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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what did the kid say when pee-wee was about to rape him ...huh just make it quick

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Your eye color is very unique.

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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