Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

Math mean: mental, abuse, to, human

What's worse than getting arrested? getting arrested on your birthday.

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

what do you call cheese that is not yours? stolen property

Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

haha Otarts was here

How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

Manchester City

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

what do you call a man with no arms or legs jetskiiing? I don't know but it seems a highly improbably situation.

roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

a guy walked into a bar, ordered a drink, sipped it slowly thinking of his waisted youth. then he finished his drink and went home to his wife of 34 years

If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

Your mom is so ugly, she suffers from severe depression and regularly contemplates suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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