What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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lebron

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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What says "Mooo"? A goat with an identity crisis.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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