Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

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Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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What was the cancer patients last wish? For the pain to go away...Yolo...-Avery Scott Vartanian

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Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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whats your moms inside look like nick because all there is is fat

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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Obamacare

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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what do friends and trees have in common? If you hit them with an axe multiple times they fall over

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

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What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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