What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

Knock, Knock ...

April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

Jake. Walsh.

Yeah, and speaking about spiderman, I got some weird senses, when I get stressed things begin seeming slower, and gets a weird blur effect, not sure what it is, but if you know what "bullet hell video games are" Technically games where you play as a tiny spaceship and lots of bullets fly around, I was always awesome at those games as a kid, because the more stress I felt while playing, the slower my perception of time felt.

so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "I'm your dog. Please stop having sex with me on Chatubate."

11th September jokes are just plane wrong.

Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

women's rights

Yo mama so fat when she sat around the hous she sat AROUND the house

Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

Mitt Romney is in the mormon mafia has magic underpants and invented Obama Care but he still lost to a Black guy Who is a fine president.

A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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