Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

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When Life gives you lemons, Make Orange Juice!

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I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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A black man went to jail while a white man received $200 dollars. They were playing a friendly game of monopoly.

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

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A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

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What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

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What do you call a dead prostitute? - You (or friends name) in 10 years

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What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

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A Black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and the bar tender says " thats something weird you got there". The parrot says "yeah i found it on the street".

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Q: Why do black people drink Grape Soda? A: Because it queches their thirst, and satisfies them.

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

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This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops