How do you get a jew out of an empty pool? Give him a lader

jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

-Wanna hear a joke? -Not really -Oh

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

What sentence on this site is the biggest cause of forever alone. "No comments yet. Be the first"

What is the most important thing to have during a zombie apocalypse? Oxygen.

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

Knock, Knock. Come In.

Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

im a dragon, no im not

What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

Niki Minaj's ass

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was DEAD!

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

a person smokes weed... and gets high

What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

A: B: No pun intended.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...