Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

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How did mary and molly have sex it is impossible for two women to perform sex

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What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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What did the black guy said when he ate a pie? Nothing, he learned not to speak with a full mouth.

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matt shut up

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Why did Justin Beiber cross the road? He didn't because he is still in the closet!

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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Why was the fish disappointed with his grades? They were all below C-level!

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Q. Which is bigger, a dog or the Statue of Liberty? (Trick question! Think carefully before looking at the answer!) A. The Statue of Liberty.

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Then lets give this another shot, this time we stop questioning how to make others happy, and if that is what makes us happy, then we ask: What else.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

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A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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