Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

I ate a pancake for breakfast not

hiya im writing this coz im drunk and ktieally slumped over the keyobard i feel relaly sick man and i dunno why i;lm teling you this, coz i should reallyt nbe om nrd ny noe. goodnight antijokers

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

What did the dog say to the dildo? Your rubber

What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

What does Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na equal? A lot of sodium

a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

A man walks into a bar... and recieves a concusion and short-term memory loss

what's the difference between people and horses? people have two less legs.

Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

Why did the girl die? No one knows.

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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